Thoughts
by Georgiana1234
Summary: A series of one shots on when Edwards little talent gets him into trouble. V funny if I say so myself which I just did.
1. Chapter 1

**AN: This is kind of silly but please review. **

Trigonometry

Edward sat to the right of Bella, who was frantically scribbling in her trig book, staring serenely into space. He had finished all of the questions in the first minute and was now doing what he usually did in lessons, exploring the minds of the people around. Jessica was cobbling (is that a word? It is now.) on about the shoes she would be wearing to some picnic down at La Push. Mike was wondering what Bella looked like naked. Edward hastily paced over him and made a mental note to give him a filthy look later.

He preferred not to read Mrs. Permenton's mind very often because she often used first period on a Monday to have romantic daydreams about a man named Archibald.

Her thoughts floated into Edwards mind. _Oh Archibald, yes Archibald, yes Archibald._

And then Mrs Permenton's real voice came short and sharp from the other side of class.

"Edward Cullen!" it said venomously.

"Yes Archibald." He replied but immediately bit his lip. Mrs. Permenton stared at him along with the whole class. Edward put his head on the desk and sighed.


	2. Chapter 2

**AN: This probably isn't as good as the first chapter but ho hum pigs bum. **

In the Cafeteria 

In a room full of babbling teenagers Edward always found it hard to concentrate and especially in the school cafeteria. He was aware that Bella was talking to him and what she was actually saying was this.

"Charlie is seriously bugging me, I mean its Bella this or Bella that or Bella don't you think you should be seeing less of that Edward boy and then he gives me this look." Bella paused to raise her eyebrows, cross her arms and tap her foot impatiently on the floor. "I tell him to stop but he just starts wagging his finger at me, always with the finger. Wag, wag, wag." Bella wagged her finger at Edward in imitation.

What Bella didn't know was Edwards mind was completely filled with Angela thoughts. She was sitting just a couple of seats along and was cobbling on (there it is again.) about getting her haircut while examining her split ends and pretending to listen to Jessica babbling on about whether Nancy Madrid and Nicolas Park where still going out or not.

_Should I cut it off or leave it long? Should I cut it off or leave it long? Should I cut it off or leave it long?_ The words bounced round Edward's head and Bella's finger wagged along in time with them.

"I mean what do you think I should do about it?" said Bella coming to the end of her rant.

Edward said the first thing that came in to his head.

"You should cut it off." he blurted out. Bella looked at him confused and slightly frightened.

"Cut Charlie's finger off Edward?" she asked tentatively. The rest of the Cullens heard her and edged along the table with Bella, away from the exasperated Edward who started mashing up the plate of shepherd's pie in front of him in frustration.


	3. Chapter 3

School Trip.

School trips were always boring thought Edward as he sat in the back row of the Trigonometry's society's lecture theatre and watched the excitable professor leaping around in front of him talking about the glory of modern calculators. He wished he had done what the girl in front of him had done and brought a book. The book was called "A blacksmith's tale" and was about the daughter of a black smith's struggle through life. It was quite good thought Edward as he listened to the pigtailed girl as she read.

Gretta, little miss black smith, had started life tragically when her father was killed by an famous outlaw passing through the lands, Gretta had escaped but barely and bore a single scar on her left arm in the shape of a horse's hoof, the outlaw's trademark sign.

Fifteen minutes into the lecture Edward was hooked. He would have happily cried, if he could have when Gretta left her childhood sweetheart Hans, cut off her long dark silky hair (in his mind Edward imagined Bella playing the mysterious Gretta) , stole some of her brother's clothes and stole away from her home in pursuit of her father's murderer. He would have happily screamed with outrage as Gretta's life long friend Jenny betrayed her as she hid from the soldiers of Hithoasis in Lopingeild and cried out in joy as she finally rode like the wind to the abandoned fortress that she now new her quarry waited for her.

There were five minutes left of the lecture and Gretta lay on the floor at the point of her enemy's sword. _"You bastard." cried Gretta and spat on the black rider's boot. He raised one eyebrow and pressed the point of his sword harder into her throat. _

"_Temper, Temper." He said and his laugh echoed around the room. Gretta choked. At that moment the doors burst open and. . . . _

". . . and that concludes our lecture for today." said the portly professor happily.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" screamed Edward, completely out raged by the interruption. He found that he was on his feet and more importantly that everyone was looking at him.

"I didn't know you felt so enthusiastic about Trigonometry Edward." giggled Rosalie from the seat next to him. Edward closed his eyes and sank back into his seat. A thought occurred to him and he tapped the pigtailed girl in front of him on the shoulder. The girl whirled around as though she had been given an electric shock.

"Erm." said Edward hesitantly. "Can I borrow that book?" The girl stared at him incredulously, gathered up her things and marched out with the rest of the year.

_I emplore you to review this story for Gretta's sake if not for mine. _


End file.
